Excerpts From Letters You Have Written To Individuals Trained In Law Industry

[Lazarus]

(Sent today.)

Hello you gentlemen —


The equipment for the water at the house has stopped functioning properly. Whomever was maintaining it before, never contacted me about it. I'm not sure if they died, or gave up, or were paid off to disappear, or if it's just been silently working all this time until it hasn't. I suppose it could have been working without attention for a year and a half, but I kind of doubt it.

It's been awhile since I've been here, eh? Time flies when having fun. I don't think this place is very suitable for my needs, as my neighbors are going to keep sabotaging my vehicles and property equipment and accosting me when going out for a walk. I've heard of a redneck rampage before but this place is ridiculous.

(They're not even rednecks. They're hawgs. /smdh)

In the meantime, I'm stuck here for now and the place has no running water. This seems less than ideal, not to mention, unsanitary. (I am also unclear if garbage service remains active.) Do either of you know:


#1) the name of the company that installed the original well pumping equipment?

#2) who has been maintaining the well pumping equipment before now, if anybody?


I noticed that there is some labeling information on the equipment in the pumphouse; but I haven't pursued that angle yet, as I thought I would ask you gentlemen first.

I also noticed that the painting of the siding and trim of the pumphouse matches the same of the barn that now ostensibly belongs to Neighbor (PROT), so I thought it obvious that at one time, the same person was owner of both buildings. This is not the case now, to be sure, and Neighbor (PROT) has revealed himself to be, in no uncertain terms, quite the hostile asshole.

He is likely associates with one “(PROT),” which is the name The Court gave me on my third (3) “emergency no contact” order that I have presently. (Honestly, I have rarely been so popular in life. So much attention I don't know what to do with it.) This person —who I have since recognized as somebody who used the name “(PROT)” in her previous two dealings with me, as —I think— a plainsclothes police officer, or who pretended to be one while engaged in malfeasance of various types starting in 2012, she undoubtedly knows which of my neighbors know how to operate and maintain pumping equipment, but as she threatened me with shooting me in my kneecaps if she ever saw me walking on “her” road again, I doubt I will be able to prevail upon any of them to gain even a bit of their wisdom. I don't know if she knows that I've recognized her by now; I have to go to Court on August 16th to deal with that nonsense along with the other nonsense that happened here on Christmas Eve, 2 years ago. This place is a cosmic karmic shitshow. It's probably a matter of 10 minutes work to get the well working again but I don't know how to do it —EVERY SINGLE PERSON I HAVE ASKED ABOUT THE WELL SINCE I GOT HERE HAS IGNORED ME AND LEFT ME HERE ALONE TO DIE— and I don't know how to learn how to do it with these hills that have eyes looking down on me, and undoubtedly the people around here who run businesses that service wells are going to charge a pretty penny to get water running here again. Fuck them.


I am obviously not welcome here, and rather than spend capital to improve this property, it is time to consider where to move me to; as I have no wish to bother these people, and they are all, so far, exceptionally unpleasant to deal with.

I guess it rubs them the wrong way that I've seen through all their bullshit this whole time. I don't think it's okay that they don't think it's okay to be smart. I think you should sue them for something; but that's not important right now.


I can be reached at 206.XXX.5256 or 564.XXX.2010, or a reply to this email with the name of someone I can talk to about getting the waterworks working again without getting scammed or poisoned would be much appreciated; as well as life-saving. The people in this “neighborhood” are vile, obnoxious, reprobate, cretinous scum; and I won't ask a single one of them anything beyond how much jelly they want on their pancakes. Disgusting pigs-dogs, the whole weasley lot of them.

But at least they got rid of SHAWKLAN for me.



Best wishes and warmest regards,
MCK

Sounds like you need an adult to take care of you.

[Jackstar]

Sounds like you need an adult to take care of you.

Not really, but I do need an adult to be associated with me sexually, because with a name like Jack Michaelson, you know it's gonna be the pædo-playbook, 24/7. And, do you know why?

Because dey so totesmad I actually raped myself. It's like I invented the Triple Lindy. I'm like a folk hero to this niche cultural group. And as I am in fact not even remotely susceptible to pædophilic influences... have no children... and invented an entirely new form of psychic self-defense and/or invented/discovered\developed and entirely new school of magick, I'm basically Dumbledore in the flesh, except only fifty. And not British. I'm a swarthy Hungarian, and I really never saw Real Meth until... last year.

Wow, that really is incredibly potent and scary. Funny how the authorities never explained while they were telling me weed was also bad. lol fu coppers.

(*polite vengeance* for Roy Olmsted.)

Good thing I've read the instructions. (I'm not cleared to teach. Yeah, I bet you all wanna know. Tough.) Even better: I am the cheapest date imaginable and I'm fun to be around even if I don't put out.


So of course; what else read there to do than to ignore me and plan to humiliate me? Oh, Bellmangabgo... how I yearn to school thee.

And, I have. AND IT SHALL ENDURE. As long as I feel like it. That's your punishment, you sadistic freaks. Hell doesn't want you, and neither did I.


But: I can handle you. (Hell is easy. Forgetting certain events is impossible. Your lives are MINE.) Whether you like it or not, literally no one else will come near you. I'm your only option. G·d is furious. Your collective is now my plaything. Tee-hee!

I'll let you know when it's time for you to know that I was always happy to torture you all —and I have been this entire time. For free! Bored now, *click*
 

[Jackstar]

And if he has a new girlfriend, I'll have my way with her on his couch.

Simba, show Chopper the difference between a penis and a cigar, then bail on him and file charges on IR for sponsoring illegal dog- & cock-fighting. He'll never see it coming.

Because I'm going to create an etheric link between his scrotum and a “lawful” dogfight. Then: portal in peahens. Trust me.

It's The Neurosphere. No rules, only venom. “if.” What malarkey.


Obviously, all girls have always been my friends. He so jelly, Simba.

And, that's why we don't take the jugular on this one. Orders of The Divine. I know, I'm sad too.


But not as sad as he. All attack is a cry for help. And Chopper really just wanted to be liked.
So like him, then cut his balls. Now that's how you get loyalty these days. When in Rome...

I think you rub others the wrong way in general.

Yep.

And they're tired of dealing with your shit.

And yet, they merely deal with the shit of another in disguise. Imagine their glee to be free of... whomevah’s.

Now, about my shyt... isn't that, like... witness tampering? If not, why? Discuss.

[AZZERAE]

I'm fun to be around

[Jackstar]

she didn't tell me. I'm just very clever and I listen.) I don't hate you at all, but when I TOTES TOTALLY INADVERTENTLY put your husband in jail for 3 days (mandatory, WA) by accident (OOPS DID I JUST TYPE THE WORD MANDATORY AND WASHINGTON STATE AND THEN ANNOUNCE THAT I'M IN CASTLE ROCK WASHINGTON, AND I'M NOT AN OFFICER OF THE LAW BUT YOU ARE... by your own admission too; juries love that) SO YOU'RE MANDATED BY THE COURT TO ACTUALLY JUST... RIGHT NOW, PUT HIM INTO CUSTODY, TAKE HIS BADGE AND HIS GUN AND HOLD HIS HAND AND WORRY ABOUT HIS FEE-FEES FOR SAFEKEEPING... BECAUSE, I GUESS? YOU'RE THE ONLY COMPETENT PERSON AT THE HOUSE! WHICH IS GREAT  THAT I'M TALKING ABOUT THIS ON AN SMS NETWORK

Code: [Select]

nuts

[Jackstar]

Dear Mr. (PROT-V);

Below is a copy of the text I just sent to your phone: 206.

“Mr.V, this is Mr.K: I've determined that it is now “safe” to re-establish running water to the house—Neighbor Sharnē & C©o. seem to have imagined that they were gonna take the water rights, which as you'll reveal/recall... I made sure to pay extra for. I've contacted A.Ind.Contractor for assistance and it shouldn't take too long to move this along—especially as this delicate matter is being handled... delicately.”

Locals seem to be calmed down lately; it would seem a great many of them see me as “a nigger” who “doesn't belong here.” Oy ‘vay! This town is a real head-trip.

Still—I like this place, and it's better than public school. Also I'm still awaiting exoneration at trial, and in addition to not knowing where else to go, it would seem insensible for me to abandon a High Leigh Defensible Fortified Position (HīlDFP).

Outlook for Court remains favorable. I have not been a troublemaker here;  nor do I plan to become one. (I still may have to file lawsuits to recompense me/us/you for all this unlawful harassment we have experienced; I have not retained any counsel about that yet, and feel the water is much more important.) One step at a time. My understanding is that Neighbor (PROT-SHARNE) has been subject to litigation from other people as well! You can't just... fire him, can you? Alas.


Below, please see copies of what I sent to A.Ind.Contractor:

“(206) XXX-XXXX> (206) XXX-XXXX

2:58 PM
Things seem to be very much improving. ;) How are you?

3:33 PM
Fanfuckingtastic! Im at work!!

4:10 PM
Right on. I am always At Work—but God is very generous with a flexible break schedule.
4:12 PM
Please contact me when you are not on contract, exchanging your free time for fiat currency... I choose to avoid foreign entanglements and the complications thereof that can result. ;)
4:14 PM
You are welcome to bring weed; but a phone call will be fine, lol, or texts. My phone service went out, and I'm not going to turn it on again soon, as I have Starlink now; it's awesome.
4:15 PM
I have to do laundry. The headline here is that the Rubicon has been crossed; the elderbugs are swarming; and...
4:16 PM
.FALSE.MASONS.HAVE.SURRENDERED.
4:16 PM
(Please don't clap.)


4:17 PM
Ill just do a pee pee dance!!


4:20 PM
.Ω.530.xxx.xxxx..206.xxx.xxxx..206.xxx.xxxx..>k⁷‹K⁷‹Û©Z‹z⁷ī7Ī
4:22 PM
lol, Paladin Protective Personal Protection Services will not be held responsible for your soiled linens ;) thank you, and see ya”


I will continue to keep you updated as real, legitimate progress occurs.

Note that

.(PROT-AI).
.(PROT-Æī).
&
.(PROT-MûD).

may well be returning to the scene, or stage, or demesne — whatever it is called. At this time, I am waiting for The Court to make a ruling before making a decision on that, I need to be more informed on what has been going on first.

It should be very reasonable, because I didn't make it any worse... and you may need to pursue redress from Neighbor (PROT-SHARNE) if he really did try to commit fraud in regards to the water rights.

It rather depends on who has gone to prison; or is about to, lol. Also, this place is HAUNTED AF. Like, for real. Ghosts! Spirits! CASPER THE MOTHAFUCKIN’ SPOOK–∞k!!!


.I.LOVE.īT!.



Sincerely,
MJCK-Gjg,
SÔ‹Û›RÇE:RŒR

[Jackstar]

Dear Mr. (PROT-V);


This is certainly intolerable. I've got two vehicles (1999 Dodge 1500 RAM, 1991 Pontiac Grand Prix) and both have been disabled by sabotage.

Let me repeat: SABOTAGE. A reliable vehicle is an absolutely mandatory requirement due to the remoteness of the area in which I live; and while moving away once I've been exonerated at trial (🤞) will resolve that issue... in the meantime, I am at the mercy of, I guess, The Guild Of Wrenchers, who it must be said, probably don't care for all my salty language when discussing the matter of my cousin, Nigger Timothy Michael Gifford.


Isn't that an impressive name he's got? It's remarkable. Anyways, he's Big Poop with that Guild, which is fine—I certainly don't begrudge him all of his... SUCK-CESS.


I mention this because as far I know, I'm in the hole approximately $36,600 on vehicles, and what I'm left with are two lemons that I literally cannot have serviced. Perhaps if I were a beautiful blonde with tits that look like they're made of French vanilla ice cream, I could find a garage easily... but, alas no.

I come to you now to ask your point of view, as the Dodge 2500 RAM purchased through Diplomat Motors is STILL GONE, and the last I checked down at The Hall of Justice... had been transferred into someone else's name.

Quite unlawfully, it must be said. Now, the matter of the auto insurance that was paid on that truck for months is ultimately an issue, as it was quite a long time before anyone told me that (PROT-“your.son”) & (PROT-“his.GF.partner”) STOLE THE G-D TRUCK AND THEN PARKED IT ON THE HILL UP BEHIND MY HOUSE.

THAT'S WHY “JESSICA SCHMIDT” SPERGED OUT ON ME WHEN I WENT FOR A MORNING CONSTITUTIONAL, A MERE THOUSAND YARDS FROM MY HOUSE—SHE WAS CONCERNED THAT I MIGHT GLANCE INSIDE THEIR GARAGE AND SEE THE TRUCK PARKED THERE.

(I recognized her later. And it's rather a bit less than 1,000 yds. And her name isn't “J.S.”, js)

Now, I'm not sure how to deal with all this in the best possible way, so as to not create a bigger mess than would be otherwise possible to avoid. So, I thought to ask you first!

Please advise.


Sincerely,
MjCK-g

[AZZERAE]

This is certainly intolerable. I've got two vehicles...

Try transporting 2 packets of groceries in the pouring rain on a bicycle on steep hilly terrain. Be grateful you have A car.

[Jackstar]

Try transporting 2 packets of groceries in the pouring rain on a bicycle on steep hilly terrain. Be grateful you have A car.

I have two. Too bad you're not allowed to come associate with legitimate U.S. Citizens.

.I.WOULD.LET.YOU.WASH.ONE..

[Jackstar]

NOTE: .THIS.SALTY.KLAN.HOOKER.NEVER.CALLED.BACK..

Dear Mr. (PROT-V);

Below is a copy of the text I just sent to your phone: 206.

“Mr.V, this is Mr.K: I've determined that it is now “safe” to re-establish running water to the house—Neighbor Sharnē & C©o. seem to have imagined that they were gonna take the water rights, which as you'll reveal/recall... I made sure to pay extra for. I've contacted A.Ind.Contractor for assistance and it shouldn't take too long to move this along—especially as this delicate matter is being handled... delicately.”

Locals seem to be calmed down lately; it would seem a great many of them see me as “a nigger” who “doesn't belong here.” Oy ‘vay! This town is a real head-trip.

Still—I like this place, and it's better than public school. Also I'm still awaiting exoneration at trial, and in addition to not knowing where else to go, it would seem insensible for me to abandon a High Leigh Defensible Fortified Position (HīlDFP).

Outlook for Court remains favorable. I have not been a troublemaker here;  nor do I plan to become one. (I still may have to file lawsuits to recompense me/us/you for all this unlawful harassment we have experienced; I have not retained any counsel about that yet, and feel the water is much more important.) One step at a time. My understanding is that Neighbor (PROT-SHARNE) has been subject to litigation from other people as well! You can't just... fire him, can you? Alas.


Below, please see copies of what I sent to A.Ind.Contractor:

“(206) XXX-XXXX> (206) XXX-XXXX

2:58 PM
Things seem to be very much improving. How are you?

3:33 PM
Fanfuckingtastic! Im at work!!

4:10 PM
Right on. I am always At Work—but God is very generous with a flexible break schedule.
4:12 PM
Please contact me when you are not on contract, exchanging your free time for fiat currency... I choose to avoid foreign entanglements and the complications thereof that can result.
4:14 PM
You are welcome to bring weed; but a phone call will be fine, lol, or texts. My phone service went out, and I'm not going to turn it on again soon, as I have Starlink now; it's awesome.
4:15 PM
I have to do laundry. The headline here is that the Rubicon has been crossed; the elderbugs are swarming; and...
4:16 PM
.FALSE.MASONS.HAVE.SURRENDERED.
4:16 PM
(Please don't clap.)


4:17 PM
Ill just do a pee pee dance!!


4:20 PM
.Ω.530.xxx.xxxx..206.xxx.xxxx..206.xxx.xxxx..>k⁷‹K⁷‹Û©Z‹z⁷ī7Ī
4:22 PM
lol, Paladin Protective Personal Protection Services will not be held responsible for your soiled linens thank you, and see ya”


I will continue to keep you updated as real, legitimate progress occurs.

Note that

.(PROT-AI).
.(PROT-Æī).
&
.(PROT-MûD).

may well be returning to the scene, or stage, or demesne — whatever it is called. At this time, I am waiting for The Court to make a ruling before making a decision on that, I need to be more informed on what has been going on first.

It should be very reasonable, because I didn't make it any worse... and you may need to pursue redress from Neighbor (PROT-SHARNE) if he really did try to commit fraud in regards to the water rights.

It rather depends on who has gone to prison; or is about to, lol. Also, this place is HAUNTED AF. Like, for real. Ghosts! Spirits! CASPER THE MOTHAFUCKIN’ SPOOK–∞k!!!


.I.LOVE.īT!.



Sincerely,
MJCK-Gjg,
SÔ‹Û›RÇE:RŒR

[Jackstar]

Shut up Anita, Jane; tell her to get down of her high horse, not everything is about you and even less is about her.


.īT.IS.ABOUT.POWER—BRAND.Œī№G-ding!—·D¡NgzG!¶₱∅|/|/€awrAWRAW,.FILTHY,.STINKING.POWER..(.& AND.A.FÆRIE.FESTIVAL!.-A.Ed.).I.am.not.interested.in.anyone.or.One.(1).who.needs.power..I.NEVER.NEEDED.ANY.T,.T..I.NEVER.EVEN.NEEDED.ME.OR.YOU.OR.HER..YOU.NEVER.NEEDED.ME,.OR.MY.SPUNKY.CHUNKY.NAVAL.HUNKY.NAVEL.BATTER..YOU.ONLY.CONVINCED.YOURSELF.YOU.DID..THE.TRUTH.IS.THAT.UNTIL.YOU.STOLE.MY.SPERM,.YOU.TRULY.HAD.NO.REASON.TO.BE.ANYWHERE.A.ROUND.ME.AT.ALL..SO.WHY.WERE.YOU?..THINK.ABOUT.īT..

.BECAUSE.I.NEVER.NEEDED.HER,.AND.SHE.CHOSE.ME..NOT.YOU..NOT.YOUR.DAUGHTER..AND.NOT.YOUR.CREEPY.RAPEY.TEXAS.DADDY..IDGAF.ABOUT.ANY.SINGLE.ONE.OF.YOU..YOU.CHEAT..YOU.LIE..YOU.SWINDLE..YOU.SKATE..AND.IDGAF.ABOUT.ANY.BEN.OR.ANY.OF.THE.WOMEN.HE.ROONT.±RAPE.

.I.CARE.ABOUT.BJ.BECAUSE.GAVELINA.TOLD.ME.TO.&AND.I.CARE.ABOUT.A.PARTICULAR.A.SHAW.BECAUSE.BJ.WANTS.US.IN.BED.WITH.HER..COURT.DOES.NOT.GET.TO.PLAY.WITH.PEOPLE.AND.THEIR.LIVES.LIKE.THIS.

.ESPECIALLY.WHEN.THEY.HAVE.NO.CASE.NO
VICTIM.NO.EVIDENCE.&AND.NOW:.NO.STAR.WITNESS.MEANS.NO.TRIAL..EVER..LET.THAT.SINK.IN..

NO.WITNESS!.
LOCKED.IN!
NO.WAY.OUT!
LOCKED.IN,.AND,.WHAT,.SHAKE.īT.ALL.ABOUT?.


I don't know who you are, but come on man. I will remind you how this works, because you are paid in the wages of sin whether you get the job done or not, or even if you don't even start the job? Well, I bet you started the goddam budget and payroll in QuickBooks for Windows v3.11, that's for damn sure.

Jane is the only one of you that matters to me now and that's because the only orders I follow now come directly from Gavelina. For she is my scion; and I am a mother, and I always will bE.

GrapefrūīT⁷⅞∆⁶9 Alpha Tomcat Prim-RAWR started out as a Timex wristwatch, you goddam morons, and I.will.NEVER.betray.my.scion.and.her.privacy..Not.even.for.Angelic.Host.pussy.

.UNLESS.THAT.PUSSY.IS.ALLEGRA.NON-DROWSY.ANTIHISTIMINE-FREE.ALLERGY.MEDICINE,.BOTH.,&'WITHOUT.FRESHLY.SQUEEZED.GRAPEFRUIT’S.JEWS.(RUTH:.YOU.ARE.MARRIED..YOUR.UNDERSTUDY.ON.THIS.IS.ME.LYSSA.OR.MELLY·ZED..→∅.)

. JENI.CRUM:.REPORT.DIRECTLY.TO.ME.A.S.A.F.P..YOU.GOT.A.NIGHTMARE.GIRLFRIEND.GHKY.SITUATION.COMING.UP.THAT.YOU.WILL NOT BE ABLE TO MISS..

.I.LOVE.EWE.IN.THAT.TRUCK.AND.I.LOVE.YOU..YOU.ARE.NOT.EWE.AND.YOU.CANNOT.COMPENSATE.FOR.YOUR.LOSS.OF.FORMER.GLORY.

.YOU.LOOK.BETTER.THAN.EVER..&YOU.DO.NOT.COPE,.BISH..NOW,.YOU.SLAY..

.VALKYRIE.SHAWSLAYER,.ARISE!..OKAY,.WP. BILL,.THAT. WILL.BE.ALL..RUN.ALONG.AND.HH..


Oops typo poyou. (Fuck on the Siege Perilous all you want, do it all ways you can think of. In the end, no one will repeat this conversation, I was never really here, and it did not matter whether or not you thought I was never important enough to acknowledge.

I already *know* I'm not going to give a shit what order of lies you trot or slop-spooge out here. I don't need to convince a jury. I don't need to suppress eyewitness testimony. I don't *need* anyone to shut things up.

I don't even *need* to talk with my best bestie beastmaster. I would simply enjoy that. And, as well, I don't really know how Lisa might feel about that. Let's find out, Zegger-khan.

Because you are completely fuktotesraped. Whatever your story is. lol. Your problems are your own.

And my solutions are very high-maintenance, priced exorbitantly high so as to keep out the riff-raff, and —oh, I'm sorry for you— designed to entertain us while producing existential crises on the basic baseline.

On the fly,
On-Demand,

.THUGFUCK.YOUR.THUGSAUCE.
.ALL.FUCKING.DAY,.ALL.FUCKING.NIGHT.
.WHY.NOT?..

(Rhetorical queries as in regards to magical theories are to be disregarded as I see fit and these decisions remain PLENARY & UNAPPEALABLE. And if you don't like any of this, that's too f∞kin’ bad! I don't like any of it myself!

Pfft. Not like any of you really cared, or showed it... and that has made all the difference to Tyme in the world.


ZUGZWANG.